Why Oh Why???




These are the everyday questions that pop up for me in my ordinary little life, and I now insist (yes via the internet) that God answer them. It's a mixture of little pet peeves, big pet peeves and other odd peeves in no particular order...

-Why oh why... do we serve food and beverages so piping hot that our tongues get burned at the first bite or sip? Meaning that the first step in consuming hot things is to wait for them to cool down? Why?

-Why oh why...do people seem to relate so deeply to the sentiments of Christmas (Peace on Earth, Goodwill Toward Men, etc...) but then seem so disinterested in reaching out, understanding and connecting in any number of ways throughout the rest of the year?

-Why oh why... when I'm at a place like a public park and I walk past a pretty women in the arms of her boyfriend does she often flash a beaming, heartfelt smile at me in some overt effort to 'connect'? But when I walk past these same women when they are alone they stare ahead disinterested? Why not stare ahead disinterested in both cases for the sake of, I don't know, consistency? It's a little like saying:'Now that we've established that there is absolutely no potential between us, I want you to know how warmly I feel toward you.' Gee thanks.

-Why oh why... do people think that anything that you tell them that involves them is a statement about them? That they are the topic of discussion?

Example:
Person A: 'I'm going to straighten up the house a little more.'
Person B: 'Great- so my housecleaning isn't good enough for you!'



-Why oh why... are so many people unable to understand that if they are 'angry' about something it means that, by definition, they are trying to tell you about a more fundamental pain that they are experiencing? And that that pain is what's really going for them.

Person A: 'I told Joe what an asshole he was for not helping with the garden today'

Person B: 'Sounds like you're disappointed and frustrated that you didn't get all the weeding done and that you're bewildered that the plans you had for the garden weren't realized. Did you tell Joe that?'

Person A: 'No, because I'm not disappointed, frustrated or bewildered- I'm just angry at Joe!'

Person B: 'I'm just asking if Joe's absence resulted in any pain for you. And suggesting that maybe you could tell him about that pain so he understands what it was like for you.'

Person A: 'I'm not in any pain- I'm just angry. All I know is that Joe is an asshole and I told him that.'

Jeez, after 20,40,60 years or whatever of living you'd think people would develop a slightly more sophisticated view of what's going on between themselves and others when there's a conflict accompanied by difficult emotions...



-Why oh why... do so many drivers think that if you ask them to drive more safely it's equivalent to criticizing their moves on the dance floor or dissing their taste in art? Hey, if your face goes through the windshield in an accident then mine probably will too buddy, so your driving is not just your little independent trip...

Less dramatically...

Why oh why... don't many drivers realize that the chief reason I don't want to be a passenger in a car that's tailgating is that it's IRRITATING. Yes, it's also somewhat dangerous, but mostly it's IRRITATING. It's a little like having a drink with someone who repeatedly sets their glass down teetering on the edge of the table on the verge of spilling. A potential accident just waiting to happen which becomes a bothersome distraction tugging on your consciousness. That's what driving with a tailgater is like for me. I guess I don't like tailgating for the same reason that I don't like having razor blades laying around on my couch or that I don't leave my wallet on the seat of my unlocked car. It needlessly invites the imagination to ponder the unpleasant potential. Is this a hard concept to grasp??

-Lastly, Why oh why... am I the only person I know who raises questions like this? It angers me but, more importantly, well... feel my pain.
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A Sure Bet....


I've been having some fun this fall plunking down modest wagers on NFL games. Indulging my inner 'Jimmy-The-Greek' and testing whether I have that rare and elusive gift of sports prognostication.

The truth is, all bets that are available have been analyzed 6 ways to Sunday (literally) and offer a careful balance of risk vs reward through either an elevated payout or via a point spread (adding points to the score of the underdog.). So a big case can be made for making your selections by simply throwing darts at your computer screen instead of spending hours carefully weighing all the factors affecting the outcome of a game. And, sadly, my own empirical research supports this supposition. The only reason I don't employ the darts method is to avoid scratches on my screen.

The screwy reality of it all is that if it was HARD to win money betting on football then, well, it would be EASY to win money betting on football. Why? Because all you'd have to do to win is place the exact OPPOSITE bets of the poor guy a few cubicles down from you who loses his shirt every Sunday. (If he could endure the obvious swipe at his level of intelligence and competency, you could put him on a small 'retainer' to advise you of his various wagers each week.)

The exception to all this is if you just so you happen to have some kind of 'inside information' on a game. Like if you know for a fact that the quarterback for one of the teams drove his Escalade over a fire hydrant and into a tree at 3AM on the night before the game and his wife had to throw a football through the back window to extricate him from the car- that might give you an edge over the other bettors. These opportunities are rare though...

That being said, the gerbil wheel of sports betting is kept aspin by this foundational notion that there is low hanging fruit to be picked from the schedule each week. 'Sure things'. 'Can't Lose Propositions'. 'No Brainers', 'Cold, Hard Locks'. Games that grandma could pick blindfolded. And it is the quest to put a finger on these easy opportunities that consumes you. Endlessly. It's related to that sense of assuredness you get each time you buy a MegaBucks Lotto ticket.

And such was my mentality when I tuned into Sportstalk radio on Friday and heard a Las Vegas Oddsmaker arrogantly prognosticating about how the Raiders would be absolutely demolished by the Steelers on Sunday and how a wager on Pittsburgh to win by 14 1/2 points was the juicy, low hanging fruit of the week just waiting to be picked. If only people like me weren't too stupid to see the light and put our money down

Well, it's Monday morning and things did not go as envisioned and I'm out 20 bucks. What bugs me isn't that the guy made a prediction- it's that he made an arrogant, cocky, pompous prediction designed to draw suckers like me in. So I thought I'd make this funny video playing the radio clip and adding some graphics for entertainment. Hope you enjoy:

CLICK HERE


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